What are our blindspots and how do they affect our relationships with others?
Are there times where we might shine a little too bright? Be a little too much? No not really – we should all shine like crazy diamonds in our own way. hashtag#dontplaysmall.
However, it is good to understand that our brightness can blind others and create a “negative” rebounding impact.
What is natural to us and feels energizing is not always well received by others. We ALL have blindspots that can land heavily.
That’s because we are so VERY different in every way you can think of: in our talent mix, the individual intensity of each of our talents, our work background, our life experiences, our culture, our education, our goals and dreams etc etc.
We are incredibly more unique and diverse amongst our professional colleagues than we have often been led to believe. A similarity does not a similar person make! 🤪
I use the Gallup Strengths tool with EVERY person I work with and part of the reason is that it helps create a deeper awareness of where you are “strong” and how that can “impact” others. Sometimes causing rifts, disagreements and frustration.
I have been coaching for 21 years and have used Gallup Strengthsfinder as my go to tool for around 12 years. I became accredited in it 5 years ago. I have read possibly over a 1000 reports and have debriefed over many 100’s of hours. I know this tool pretty well and it certainly knows us!
I describe the blindspots of our Top 5 strengths as how we can land and impact others negatively and therefore create “rub”and reaction.
People don’t choose to disagree to create conflict, or put up a block to limit their growth, but what they will do is react to our heavy strengths/talents when we are pushing them out hard. They may react back with negative counter emotions and their associated behaviours e.g. frustration, annoyance, confusion, anger.
Our strengths can indeed be our weaknesses! Our feedback throughout our career can often be linked to this. (Entire new post option there!)
Here are some examples of what I hear often during meetings (that make me smile) that demonstrates not only someones unique strengths but also how it shows up for others:
“Gosh why is he so slow, he’s had all week to get it done?”
(The drive of an ACHIEVER)
“I think we need to ask more people what they think about that?”
(The wanting to involve all INCLUDER)
“I still need to see more facts and info on that”
(The more data and facts the better ANALYTICAL)
“We need to get this started, we’ve been discussing this for far too long!”
(The impatient ACTIVATOR)
“I’ll take that on”
(The overloaded RESPONSIBILITY)
“I’ve had a new thought”
(The constant idea generator IDEATION)
“What’s our next goal - where next?”
(The constant aim for excellence MAXIMISER)
“I’ve got 4 or 5 articles that you may be interested in reading”
(The gathering of info INPUT)
Get my drift! Relate to any of these? 🤭 I show up a few times in there!